"A Great Explanation"

The wife came home early and found her husband
in their bedroom making love to a very attractive
young woman. And she was somewhat upset.

"You are a disrespectful pig!" she cried "How dare
you do this to me -- a faithful wife, the mother of your
children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce right away!"

And the husband replied, "Hang on just a minute,
love, so at least I can tell you what happened."

"Fine, go ahead," she sobbed," but they'll be the last
words you'll say to me!"

And the husband began -- "Well, I was getting into the
car to drive home, and this young lady here asked me
for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenceless
that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I noticed
that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty.
She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days.

So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed
up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you
wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight!
The poor thing devoured them in moments.

Since she needed a good clean-up, I suggested a
shower, and while she was doing that, I noticed her
clothes were dirty and full of holes, so I threw them
away. Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the
designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but
don't use because you say they are too tight. I also
gave her the underwear that was your anniversary
present, which you don't use because you tell me
I don't have good taste.

I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas
that you don't use just to annoy her, and I also donated
those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and
don't use because someone at work has a pair the
same."

The husband took a quick breath and continued - "She
was so grateful for my understanding and help that as
I walked her to the door, she turned to me with tears
in her eyes and said,

"Please ... Do you have anything else that your
wife doesn't use . . .?"